15 Years of Blogging

 It is hard to believe, but I have now been blogging for 15 years. How our little family has changed throughout those years! 

Here are a few excerpts from my blog post on January 9, 2006, exactly 15 years ago today. The post was called "Why We Homeschool: The Intangible Version," and gives a wonderful peek into what our lives were like then, when Jesse was 12, Laurel 8, and Duncan 5. 

***

We homeschool because....
* of days like today, when we had a spontaneous winter picnic. That in itself is lovely. But every aspect of it adds to the delight of homeschooling: my daughter made pbj's cut into perfect triangles; my 12-year-old son pushed my 5-year-old son in the swing so we could prepare the picnic; my parents joined us, making it a three-generation spontaneous winter picnic; my kids don't think it's weird to have a picnic on a rickety table in January. They're used to stuff like that.
* of days like today, when my son had fun doing pre-algebra.
* of days like today, when my dad came to hang out and read my son's math book.
* of days like today, when my daughter gave her little brother her "squishy pillow" to sleep with because he was upset.
* of days like today, when my littlest guy said, "Can I have these pennies to send to the poor children in Africa?"
* of days like tomorrow, when we can just drop all our "regular" studies to take advantage of a wonderful wildlife program that's going on all week.
* of hundreds of yesterdays and tomorrows, filled with yellow rainboots jumping in puddles; mouths smeared with cookie dough; tears shared over sad books; lightbulbs flashing when a concept is mastered; muddy clothes and huge smiles; popcorn and movies; little prayers said; brothers and sister huddled over a game; sweet kisses on my cheek; fights over who loves Mommy most; happy yells when Daddy comes home; sweet friendships with other homeschooling families; and a million other little day-to-day treasures that might never be captured without homeschooling.

***

The five year old is now 6'4". He's majoring in Outdoor Education in college. He still has a big smile all the time. He's one of the most pleasant people I have ever been around.  Today we waved goodbye to him as he drove off to college. I miss him already.

Before he left, my parents (95 and 93), whom we are so blessed to still have with us, came over for brunch. We ate biscuits and gravy. Mom said the same things over and over again ("Randy, did you make this? Jim has started cooking too!" "Duncan is so tall!" "Duncan, do you cook?"). Dad gave us all a lesson on eskers and drumlins — landforms left behind my glaciers. He is still teaching us, still sharing his expansive knowledge. And sweet Mom will always be the party girl.

That sweet little girl who comforted her little brother is still, at 23, comforting people, still making the world a softer, more beautiful place to live. She's in her second year of graduate school, getting her master's degree in marriage and family therapy. She and her husband live in a cute little apartment in Nashville. They were here for nearly a week over Christmas, and my heart nearly burst with joy at seeing my daughter every single day. I can never get enough of her. She is strong and capable, gentle and compassionate, funny and so much fun. Hunter has fit so nicely into our family. I can't wait to see where they go next in their lives!

And that 12-year-old who was having fun with pre-algebra is now 27 and in his second year of law school, having fun writing briefs and memorizing cases and working on the law review. He and his fianceé, Summer, decided to postpone their wedding because of COVID, but it is something we keep looking forward to, one of these days. Summer is lovely and funny and seems like she's been part of our family forever. We can't wait until the threat of COVID is over, vaccinations are had all around, and we can resume our monthly dinners with Jesse and Summer.

We're so proud of all our kids. Those three little people have grown into lovely adults who we consider our closest friends. They are compassionate, intelligent, and fun to be around. They care about making the world a better place, about justice, equity, and caring for this beautiful planet. And while they don't fight over who loves Mommy the most anymore, at least not that I know of, they clearly love us and enjoy spending time with us. Randy and I do not take that gift lightly. It's probably the great prize of parenting yet —having kids who like to hang out with us.

As much as we adore spending time with our kids, Randy and I have adapted to empty nesting well. He continues teaching at the University of Tennessee (21 years now) and I am now an adjunct instructor in the English department at our local private college, Maryville College. With the pandemic we are both working from home most of the time, Zooming, grading, and preparing lessons from our own favorite spots in the house. In the evenings we do what pretty much everyone else does: watch something on Netflix or Hulu. We will celebrate 32 years in March, but honestly, we celebrate each other every day. This year, like last, we will probably forego our anniversary trip, thanks to COVID. 

One of these days, we'll travel again.

And so here we are, 15 years later. All grown up, but still treasuring all those sweet, intangible things.

Books Read in 2020

 I read 60 books in 2020: 8 more than my goal of 52. I probably have the pandemic to thank for that, right? Here are the books and some comments about each collage.

This is a particularly good set of books! Some of my favorites of the year (a 4 or 5 star ratings on my Goodreads) are here: Dear Edward, The Book Woman of Troublesome Creek, The Gifted School, Stay, The Extraordinary Life of Sam Hell, Writers and Lovers, Defending Jacob, Your Perfect Year, and Between the World and Me. 

Persuasion and The Bean Trees were both re-reads, and both were for book clubs. Persuasion still bored me, and I still loved The Bean Trees. It's been 30 years since I read them! 

Prep was one of my least favorite books of the year. The main character was intriguing and I had high hopes for her, but ultimately....she just turned out to be self-absorbed and without any sort of growth. Pizza Girl was horrid. Unfortunately, it was the book I picked for book club for 2021, as it sounded rather fluffly and fun! I have already taken it off the list, begging my fellow clubbers not to read it. 

This collage has more of my favorites and a few I did not like at all. The Silent Patient, March, The Other Wes Moore, Where the Crawdads Sing, The Vanishing Half, The Islanders, and The Silent Treatment all garnered 4 or 5-star ratings from me on Goodreads. I also really liked The Operator and found Carole King's autobiography fascinating.

The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning, Messy Grace, and the Lager Queen of Minnesota were three of the five worst books of the year for various reasons. Death Cleaning was actually interesting, but it was a terrible book to read in the midst of a pandemic. Also, one of our best friends had just passed away as I was listening to the audiobook, and it really just made me cry a lot.

And this last collage is full of wonderful memories! These are actually the first 20 books I read of the year, pre-pandemic. Remember those days? I loved Dear Mrs. Bird, This Is How It Always Is, Matchmaking for Beginners, The Sweeney Sisters, and Southernmost. 

Becoming, Just Mercy, and Born to Run were my favorite nonfiction books of the year. Oh man. I loved each of those so much!

Things Fall Apart was a re-read for me. I used to teach this in high school literature classes and decided to re-read it, as my college sophomore was reading it for a class. What an amazing book!

I really disliked Mrs. Everything. I don't remember much about it except that way too much happened. Snow took a long, long time for me to plow through. It was a book club choice, and I think we all agreed that we wish we had understood it better. The prose was beautiful, but the topic was difficult and the history largely unfamiliar to us. Dear Mrs. Bird and Courting Mr. Lincoln were also book club books. Heart in the Right Place may have been also, but I do not remember that one.

Here is my 2020 Top Reads List, although really, I could have added many more for fiction!

Top 10 Best Fiction:

Dear Edward by Ann Napolitano

The Extraordinary Life of Sam Hell by Robert Dugoni

The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennett

This Is How It Always Is by Laurie Frankel

The Book Woman of Troublesome Creek

The Gifted School by Bruce Holsinger

Stay by Catherine Ryan Hyde

Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens

The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides

The Sweeney Sisters by Lian Dolan

 

Nonfiction:

Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson

The Other Wes Moore by Wes Moore

Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates

 

Memoir

Becoming by Michelle Obama

Born to Run by Bruce Springsteen

March by John Lewis

What were your favorites for 2020?

October Camping and Canoeing: Henry Horton and the Duck River

 The weekend began perfectly. The weather was lovely: cool enough for a fire but warm enough for just a t-shirt. We chose Henry Horton State Park because it's close to our Nashville kids and, frankly, it was one of the few TN State Park campgrounds that had any spaces left when we reserved this over a month ago. The pandemic has definitely brought more and more folks out to campgrounds! 

We set up our mansion tent, and Laurel and Hunter set up their cute little tent. Randy built a fire, made his fabulous paella, and we just enjoyed catching up with our kiddos. And then the rain began. Man, I love camping with the sound of the rain gently falling on the tent! 

Or in this case... on the roof of the car.

Because our mansion leaked! When we headed off to bed, we discovered that our blankets, cots, sleeping pads, and pillows were soaked. The tent floor was full of puddles. The only thing we could do was sleep in the car! We kind of missed the van, yep.

But we're all about adventure, right? Fortunately, I'd packed a couple of extra blankets, and our pillows weren't totally soaked, so we made it through the night. The rain stopped before we awoke, and we enjoyed a fire and Randy's delicious breakfast bowls. I'm so lucky. He's the absolute best camping chef! It was a chilly morning, but fortunately, I had a big towel for a blanket. This picture is for Duncan, who thinks it is hilarious that I use a towel for a blanket when I'm sitting around in the house. But I mean, come on! It's a perfect size and weight for warm weather! 

But I digress. Note the blankets and such hanging out to dry. We had canoes reserved for the day, so we left all our stuff out drying and headed to the Duck River. We had a perfect day for canoeing! It was a bit chilly, but we were the only people on the river. The leaves were just starting to change. We stopped on an island and had lunch about halfway through, then hopped back in our canoes. The whole afternoon was perfectly quiet except for a few kingfishers and blue herons.

The whole trip took us way less time than we thought, which turned out to be a really good thing. As we headed back to camp, the rain started pouring again... and we'd left all our stuff out to dry. We decided it was time to pack throw all the wet gear in the car and head to Laurel and Hunter's warm, dry apartment, just 45 minutes away in Nashville. 

So, we had hot showers and ate our steak at the table, warm and dry. It was all incredibly fun, honestly, from the rainy night to the lovely canoe trip to the unexpected night at Laurel and Hunter's sweet little home. 

We got home early in the afternoon. Load two is in the dryer and load three is in the washer, and we have all the gear outside drying. Can't wait to do it all again!

Waterfall Chasing: Piney Falls

 Summer 2020 has been all about exploring waterfalls, mostly in Tennessee but with a few trips over into North Carolina. We probably averaged an adventure every-other-week. Every single falls has its own personality. Some are exuberant, some gentle. Some shout, some sing softly, a few just whisper. I love hearing the water's voice and knowing we are almost there, and then getting that first glimpse of a falls through the trees. Our waterfall explorations have been a way to soothe our souls during these past many months of the coronavirus pandemic.

We visited Piney Falls State Natural Area in mid June. Duncan joined us for this one, which made it even more of an adventure!  

 

We love our Tennessee State Parks and of course the Great Smoky Mountains National Park, but there are also 85 Natural Areas that are affiliated with the TN State Park system. These absolute treasures are guaranteed to be less crowded than the parks.

 

 

The trail was an easy 2.5 mile loop that included two falls, lots of climbing spots—and we only saw about 5 other people the entire day.

The trail takes you first above the falls. I always get a little woozy on the top of falls, and Upper Piney Falls is an 80-foot drop. Of course, I still get a little nervous when one of my kids stands on the edge, even if he is 19.

 

 

Upper Piney is a gorgeous falls, especially after lots of rain. There is a terrific swimming hole there and lots of good rocks for picnicking upon. When you're done looking at the falls, you can follow the trail right behind it.

 

 From there, the trail follows Piney Creek downstream to Lower Piney Falls, with this amazing sandstone wall on one side. Duncan would definitely like to come back and do some more climbing here!

 

Lower Piney Falls is less impressive.... from the top, anyway! There's no access to the bottom of the falls, so you have to peer over the top of the cliff. Still the cascades were pretty!

This was definitely one of my favorite falls....although I'll probably say that about most of them! This is just a little over an hour from Knoxville, on the Southern Cumberland Plateau.

Sheltering at Home: March and April in a Pandemic

I want to remember this strange time, and how we were during a pandemic.

Largely, we were the same.

Outside the window, the bright red male cardinal and a special guest towhee perched on the black hook of the feeder while the red-bellied woodpecker hammered at the drain pipe, all spring long, marking his territory. Squirrels clung like acrobats to the feeders, and Randy periodically yelled, "Hey, squirrel! Scram! You're a jerk!" The flowers bloomed in their usual order: daffodils, forsythia, hyacinths, tulips, daisies, roses, irises, sweet William, peonies. Spring has been exceptionally long and beautiful this year, with cool evenings and temperatures only reaching 90 once so far.

Inside the house, I read, kept all the household things moving along, taught a class from couch or table, fixed meals, played mindless games on my laptop, watched Netflix. Like everyone else everywhere. Randy worked mostly from the sunporch, teaching classes and having meetings via Zoom.  Bonus: I get to go outside, walking around in my big yard or in our neighborhood, with its wide lawns and streets. Randy and I both did lots of yardwork—he even conquered our side yard, which was an absolute jungle of weeds, ivy, and honeysuckle. What victory!

Teaching a Brave Writer class from home

Randy conquering the jungle

Duncan arrived home toward the end of March. He had been in Peru on a spring break ecology trip when the world went crazy. He was off the grid in the Amazonian rainforest and had little idea of what was happening. He got out of Peru just two hours before the country closed its borders, and they made it back to North Carolina safely. They quarantined then, having been in four major airports. We were so happy to see him when he finally got back home. He was sad, of course, to leave college with just six weeks left, but he's such a happy guy. He diligently did his online classes and connected with his friends daily. He's definitely made the best of a weird situation.

Duncan arrived home from college with an extra roll of TP

When all the climbing walls are closed....

Lots of hammocking

Watching the quiet world

Once a week or so, we ventured outside for hikes. Before the national and state parks closed, we headed there. After, we had to settle for less scenic city parks or just the neighborhood.

Stinging Creek Falls

East Lakeshore Trail

Obed Natural Area

Obed Natural Area

We celebrated birthdays, worked, chatted with family, held book club, and gathered with friends via Zoom. We talked to Randy's mom, who is quarantined at her senior care facility, via FaceTime each Tuesday.

Mom turned 93

The entire family joined her Zoom birthday celebration!

Book club!

Tuesday FaceTiming with Randy's mom. Thanks to her awesome nurse, Leslie, for setting this up each week!

Celebrating Jesse's 27th birthday!

Weekend family chat

Randy has been our ambassador to the outside world. Once every week, he puts on mask and gloves and heads out to the grocery store for us and my parents.

We visited our Knoxville kids once, bringing bread and flowers and wine. It was sooo good to see them, from a distance, of course. The streets of Knoxville were empty and quiet.

Like so many couples, one of the first questions when this began was:

They've decided to postpone their wedding until next summer because they really had their hearts set on getting married July 4. I totally understand--it's so weird to plan a wedding during this time when we all feel in limbo.

Limbo. That's how March and April felt, as if we were suspended in time. It's been a sweet time, honestly, for the most part. There is certainly an underlying, uneasy feeling of uncertainty, of course. A restlessness. And yet we have enjoyed more time together without the pressures of having to go anywhere. We are among those who have secure jobs that can be easily moved to home. We have shelter and food and reliable internet access and financial security. Our parents are safe, our children are safe, our friends are safe, and we are all healthy. As of today, our county has had 77 cases of COVID-19. We're still rising a case or two each week. Everything has opened back up now, so we are watching the numbers to see what happens next.

And that's life in the first two months of coronavirus.